Is Your Sanity on the Line?

Posted on February 13, 2012 by admin
This week in Utah the weather has been like many of our lives. One day, it was gorgeous outside, filling me with motivation and energy.  The next, the snow came down and kept on coming, and then kept on coming some more. When my boys and I looked out the window we could barely discern where the sky ended and the ground began because everything was shrouded in white.  After observing the weather and the totally buried roads, we decided to scamper downstairs and snuggle up beside the fireplace to watch Phineas and Ferb (my boys current favorite).

As we bonded safe and sound in our cozy living room, it occurred to me that sometimes our lives feel like temperamental weather! We may start off motivated, and then suddenly we can’t tell which way is up anymore. Things just keep coming at us and we can’t seem to get our bearings. As a result, we want to hibernate in our comfort zone where it is safe from experiences we can’t control. (Correct me if I am wrong here, but what I am describing is certainly something I have felt many times. You?)

For me, it can be hard to find the motivation to leave that comfort zone, to re-enter a place in life where so much is coming at me that my sanity is threatened. This is when I realize that I need to take a step back, re-evaluate my priorities, simplify where possible, and call for reinforcements. 

Reinforcements can consist of your spouse, older children, your mom, neighbor, a babysitter or day care, or a personal coach. While I was recovering from surgery last fall, my own coach was a lifesaver to help me keep perspective, recognize the progress I was making, and to strategize specific, manageable steps to keep me moving forward. 

So, how’s your sanity doing this week? Time to check your priorities? Ready to simplify? Willing to call in reinforcements? Remember, you may be Incredi-mom, but even superheros have a support team! Choose one step you are going to do today and take back your sanity. I’d love to hear your commitment on my Facebook page. Here’s a link: https://www.facebook.com/CoachValene. If you could use some help saving your sanity, contact me now at admin@coachvalene.com and let’s talk strategy!

Isn’t it time to Love your life? 

~Valene Middleton
Life Organization & Balance for Professional Moms
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Are You Running Faster Than You Have Strength?

Posted on January 26, 2012 by admin
Dishes, laundry, deadlines, carpool, commitments, date night, exercise, pay bills, return calls . . . .what is on your daily and weekly to-do list? As moms, working moms, and frankly as women in general, we have a tendency to “take on more than we can chew.”
Over-committing ourselves may work for a time; we can keep all the balls in the air and play incredi-mom, either congratulating ourselves for going above and beyond, or berating ourselves for all the things we are doing at only a percentage of our best because we are so spread out. The fact is, no matter how good we are at juggling, unless the pace and expectations we set for our lives is sustainable, sooner or later some of the balls are going to fall.
This week, take a look at the expectations you have set for yourself and your life. Consider all of the commitments you have made and what you are “supposed” to get done each week and each day. Is your plan sustainable? Can you successfully live up to your expectations on a sustainable basis? If not, brainstorm what you can transition out of your life. Simplify. Adjust your image of “incredi-mom” for your family and make some new, conscious choices about how you are going to spend your time and energy. Trust me, it makes a big difference!


 

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It’s Joy Bucket Thursday!!!!

Posted on January 26, 2012 by admin
Welcome to Joy Bucket Thursday! 
Just hop on over to my Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/CoachValene and add a post about what brings you JOY! A photo, a thought, an experience, a person, if it brings joy to your life on any level, please share it! :)
As a mom with many roles to play, life is very busy. Many of us have a tendency to get so caught up in ”getting things done” that is can be easy to miss out on the little things that make life, and all we do, truly
worth it.
Because of this, I always teach my clients to “Celebrate the Moment”. Celebrate the successes in your life big and  small. Your little one used the potty– Woo-hoo! Your teenager picked up his socks– Hurrah! You planned
dinner BEFORE 5 p.m.– go Mom!
To help you celebrate the moment, please join me on my Facebook page for JOY BUCKET Thursday! 

A Joy Bucket is a bucket, or notebook, or file, or whatever you want it to be, that holds your joy. Meaning it is a collection or list of things that bring you joy.

Take a picture, write it down, do something that captures whatever it is that brings you joy! When you have a bad day, life comes at you hard, or you could simply use a boost, out comes the Joy Bucket, and suddenly life is a little better.

I invite you to create your own Joy Bucket this year. Get started by participating in the fun of  Joy Bucket Thursday on my Facebook page.

So . . . today’s Thursday. Will you share some JOY today? 

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Welcome to 2012! Want your New Year resolutions to last past January?

Posted on January 2, 2012 by admin
 Aloha and Happy New Year! 
I hope your new year is off to a great start! My family and I rang in the new year celebrating my son’s second birthday. He was the the first baby of the decade for the state of Utah and let me tell you . . . New Year’s hasn’t been the same since! (I know, it’s only been two years, but still!)  :)

So I have spent the last few weeks contemplating my resolutions for 2012. For me, setting and achieving goals, realizing resolutions is a way of life rather than something that happens just once a year. That being said, I still like to use January 1st as a checkpoint to evaluate my life and refine my focus.  I suspect I am not the only one. Thus, I would like to share a short video with you of the KEY to establishing a new habit or making your goals become reality.

By the way, stay tuned for a fun announcement that will share with you the result of my 2012 “resolution refining process”.
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Remember the Basics this Holiday Season

Posted on December 9, 2011 by admin

It is the time of year when flurries of snow are common, goals for the new year are considered, music is everywhere, and festive lights twinkle at us from near and far.  Parties are planned, there are concerts everywhere and we are surrounded by talk of what to give and get for Christmas or Hanukah.  What a wonderful time!!! Or is it?

For many, a wonderful time of the year has led to us feeling bombarded by holiday sales, pressured by long ‘want’ lists, and engulfed by a hectic schedule and to-do list that can never be met. We have become so caught up in the cultural expectations of the season, that we have forgotten why we are doing everything we do.

Today I encourage you to go back to basics and consider what is most important in your life.  Family. A roof overhead.  Food to eat.  Friendship.  Hope. Clothes to wear….that cover you and keep you warm. You get the idea.

Here are a few other thoughts to put into action this season I have been considering, and encourage you to do as well.

Think of this holiday season as an opportunity to:

Love deeper. Feel more. Capture the moment.  Savor the feelings. Be present. Let go of the commercialism. Say no. Cut the social commitments. Trust your heart. Notice the little things. Share your love, your heart, your hurts, your dreams. Save someone. Believe in your own worth. Be kind to yourself. Cut someone a break. Be consistent. Treasure your time together. Surprise yourself. Surprise someone else. Let go of the past. Be real. Enjoy the moment. 

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Wonder if your efforts are worth it?

Posted on December 1, 2011 by admin

Okay Moms, welcome to December!!! Are you ready for it? Here we go, ready or not!!

I’ve been hearing more lately about the stress holiday time seems to bring than the joy the season is supposed to inspire.

Women everywhere are rushing about trying to take care of everyone’s needs. Deadlines at work, demands from the kids, a bank account that doesn’t seem to reflect what you want it to . . .

Sometimes, no matter how much effort you put into taking care of everything, somethings still seems to fall through the cracks and you may wonder if all your energy and efforts are worth it. Why bother?

Whether preparing for the holidays, or at anytime in life, this short video addresses the impact that even our smallest efforts can make.

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Life Lessons From Pain and Circumstance

Posted on November 10, 2011 by admin

Well, I am in the midst of recovering from another surgery and find myself struggling more from the inability to do the things I want to do (lack of energy) than from surgery pain. That being said, I am thrilled that after more than 17 years of dealing with excruciating pain from endometriosis, I will (hopefully) soon be pain free. Hooray!!

If you have ever dealt with, or are dealing with any kind of chronic pain–I get it. There were days when I was curled up in a ball on the couch, doused with pain killer, holding onto a heating pad for dear life–two heating pads actually,
one for the front and one for the back. And I couldn’t play with my kids. And laundry needed to be done. And dinner needed to be made. And I was trying to just survive.

I learned many tricks to help manage my life while dealing with chronic pain–to care for my kids, run my business, to keep on keeping on, and to take care of myself too. Thank goodness for life management skills! I didn’t always have them.
I had to learn.

If you are struggling with some area of your life, something that you wish you knew how to manage better, let’s chat. You may be surprised. You really don’t have to do this thing called life and motherhood alone.

On another note, not all pain is physical. Here’s a quick video that deals with what to do when you are hurting, and no one seems to care.

Isn’t it time to love your life? ~Valene

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Ever feel intimidated in motherhood, business, or life? Try this . . .

Posted on November 2, 2011 by admin

You know those days when you feel like life is coming at you fast? The kids need your help, you are committed to this event, you need to respond to that, you didn’t get much sleep last night, there is no time for exercise today, the thought of what to make for dinner –you don’t even want to go there.

Laundry needs to be done, toilets are looking disgusting, the kids are acting up again (cuz you are too overwhelmed to be very patient) and date night . . . well, sometime. Face it, sometimes motherhood, parenting, your side-job or even full-time job, let’s go so far as to say life in general can become intimidating.

And when you feel intimidated it’s easy to give up, to cave to that feeling of being overwhelmed, incapable, or simply not enough. Once you are there, it can be tough to get out of.

Today, I offer you a challenge. A challenge to make your life better. Next time you are feeling a bit (or a lot) intimidated, or if you are feeling it right now, consider the thought expressed in this short two-minute video.

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Are the Holidays or Upcoming Events STRESSING You Out?

Posted on October 27, 2011 by admin
Does the thought of quickly approaching holidays make you break out in hives? No? How about a heightened anxiety level combined with less sleep, higher bills, more expectations, and an overall sense of “oh boy, here we go again!”?

Never fear! Reinforcements are here! Watch this quick video to learn a few tips that will allow you to enjoy your holidays or upcoming event with calm and satisfaction.

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How do YOU handle things you can’t control?

Posted on October 14, 2011 by admin
Aloha!

As the seasons change, so do the routines and activities in our homes and lives. Sports change, school is ramping up, the weather is throwing us for a loop (at least it has in Utah the last few weeks!)  And with all this change we MUST flex and adapt or life becomes miserable as we fight against what we can’t control. 

Learn how a homeschooling, stay-at-home mother of three uses this idea to keep the “overwhelm factor” at bay in this quick video made just for YOU! :)

Isn’t it time to love your life?   ~Valene Middleton

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